August 5, 2017

How To Get A Job: 2017

>Dad keeps insisting i go in person to hand out resumes because he doesn't understand that people apply online these days
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It's not the worst of advice.
Don't have 45 minutes?
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>>2962577 (OP)
Applying online doesn't work you anti-social loser. How many emails do you delete a day? A recruiter gets 40x that daily of people applying online.

You know who will get your resume? The person you hand it to.
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>>2962577 (OP)
He's not wrong, recruiters who know your name and face are far more likely to consider you for a job than some nobody from an online job listing.

>Hundreds of online applicants
>One guy who made the effort to introduce himself

HMMMMM
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you are a number on the internet. In person you are much more valuable. Stop being a cuck and use your head.
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>>2962577 (OP)
do it dude, thats how i got my first job. I applied online and nothing. I pestered managers and multiple stores, got a few interviews and eventually a job a week later. People like looking at the people they hire, especially for casual jobs.
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>>2962577 (OP)
my mom was like "why dont you go there and ask in person"

mom this aint the 80s , last time you applied for a job was 30 years ago , stuff changed
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>>2962588
>>2962592
>>2962595
>>2962596
>>2962598
Dad?

How the fuck did you find my thread and how are you posting from all these different IDs at once?
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>>2962617
and within a minute.

I'm (>>2962588) and I've got all my jobs by circumventing recruiters and finding out the head of the department and his email.
(30 with a math PhD and 6 figures.)
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>>2962617
protip: your dad knows more than you
"experience is what you get just after you needed it"
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>>2962577 (OP)
in 2017 this means to set up meetings over coffee/informational interviews with people in the industry you want to work in. this is how you get personal referrals to companies which is what people mean by not applying online.

if you are applying online to stuff, you also need to reach out directly to recruiters or people that work at those companies through linkedin since online job applications are black holes mostly
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>>2962577 (OP)
>oh you're looking for a job? go talk to jeff, he'll hook you up.
your dad should insist you go to church or join the masons or some kind of social group. have you gone outside recently? any good job requires having connection. there's like five 150K a year jobs in my industry i would love to have but i don't know the right people.
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>>2962784
I'm a NEET just trying to get somewhere in the world, anywhere. What should I do?
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>tfw landed all my internships from applying online only
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>>2962577 (OP)
Just go to McDonalds or Arbys and eat some lunch for a few hours then go back home. He wont know the difference.


>>2962592
i've had like 15 jobs in the last 10 years and all of them i got by applying online.

if you even go into a place now days and ask for an application they will look at you like your insane.
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>>2962592

Applying through a 3rd party recruiter is more difficult than applying directly through the company.
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>>2962577 (OP)
listen to your dad, he is your friend and ally with your best interest always in mind
unless you're applying through temp agencies, then you're just a shit expendable biorobot
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>>2962784
This is the best advice you'll ever get for applying for a job. HR shoots down resumes, and only forwards ones they see as good. (Coincidentally, they're often Chad and Stacy resumes). At the end of the day, the hiring manager hires the best person for the job, and the best way to get through HR is to go around HR.
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>>2962577 (OP)
tfw. you're not patrician enough to recognize the modern equivalent of handing in CV in person:
Write to the relevant people on Linkedin.
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>>2962908
>Just go to McDonalds or Arbys and eat some lunch for a few hours then go back home. He wont know the difference.

I feel like I'd be only screwing myself rather than him though. Who am i really fooling by not making money, getting job experience or doing anything?
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The real question is, should I even include my worthless university degree on my resume or should I just leave it out with the possibility of them asking why there is such a huge gap in my work history.
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>>2962577 (OP)
Your dad is right. Handing in resumes IRL shows effort and employers like that.
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>>2963017
Include all education. A BS in something is still better than a high school diploma. If you can, tactfully include specific education that is relevant to the job as well.

Ex. You got a degree in Marketing, but also include that you know your way around Tableau, Excel, data manipulation, etc. Looks a lot better.
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>>2963028
How is the economy way back there in the 70s?
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>>2963028
>>2963054
Anon is right.

In person shows drive, anon. Separate yourself from the normies and stand out
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holy shit i really need to poop but i have an erection right now

also there is a giant fucking bug in my washroom

what the fuck do i do biz??
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>>2962577 (OP)
Protip son, wear lip balm and women's perfume. A little curious goes a long way these days just make sure you look him in the eye while he nuts and say "no homo" after swallowing obv
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>>2962577 (OP)
Just lie. Go out and sit in your car and make applications on your phone.
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>>2962611
Lol stupid boomer whore amiright
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>>2962577 (OP)
protip: prove you're an alpha millenial by calling ahead of time.
Call the business, ask if they are hiring and what positions might be open. If they aren't hiring, put them on your second string list.

If they are hiring, chances that the person talking on the phone is the person you will meet is nill. On the phone, you'll get an impression about the company and get a little familiarity and if you say anything awkward it won't matter.
When you walk into the business in person, the manager or HR director you talk to will be more impressed by your casual attitude and your familiarity with the company already.

Emailing resumes is cuck shit.
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Your dad is actually right and you should listen to him.
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>>2963280
This sounds literally from the normie playbook, has this actually ever worked for anyone besides a movie actor?
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>>2963305
my personal experience is only tied to nepotism but I've seen people show incentive and get jobs without knowing any insiders
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>>2962882
internships? you mean for school? of course you did your employer gets subsidized for hiring internets. If you were looking for an actual job you'd have to apply in person.

Also this thread
>applying for jobs that have you fill out an application
wagecucks anonymouse
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Number of jobs I've ever gotten by applying online: zero

Number of jobs I've gotten by applying in person: I dunno like twenty
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>>2963400
hmm i guess ill do it senpai
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Lol my dad told me the same shit
>work dead end warehouse job for poverty wage because only option
>dad says
>son you should go in person and hand in resumes(not against it) you need a job that pays u at least $15-16 an hr 

Yea dad lemme call the 100s of entry level jobs that pay me 15-16hr right now fuck I should've realised that fucken yrs ago
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>>2964569
lol
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>>2964569
>only option
i don't suppose you've thought about getting off your ass and learning some skills.
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File: Old Economy Steve.png (1.43 MB, 520x1865)
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>>2962577 (OP)
>>2962577 (OP)

Boomers gotta burn.
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i tried it it didn't work
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>>2964686
Top kek, this board is full of NEETs who gamble with their mummy's money on shitcoins. Do you honestly expect anyone on here actually has the capacity to learn business valuable skills?
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>>2964848

I literally asked my mum for money to buy coins. Of course I didnt tell her what it was for, told her I had to buy some books for uni.

Started with less than 100€ and have about 600€ now though, so it worked well.
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>>2964862
get a fucking job
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This is unironically how you get a job, OP. Applying online is bullshit.

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